Had a wonderful time and more wonderful to have met you both. You sure know
how to make everyone feel at home.  (I am not asking for a refundbecause of
the jeep trip from the airport, nor for the mosquito bites, or thelack of
cold water - cuz it was nice roughing it.)  ;-)  Also nicethat you
introduced us to your many friends, making it an even greater memoriable
vacation.  Glad I stayed away from the bars ---tooooooo much temptation- but
was fun to have seen it the last night.  Already miss the nicefresh coffee,
breakfast prepared by the cute cook and the cute cook that preparedthe
evening meals - which was more that I had expected!  It was relaxingjust to
watch the HOST in his casual dress - running a truly quality establishment.
It is time for you to take a bow now Jaime.......   The flightto Dallas was
uneventful, but nice.  In Dallas it was another story - our secondreschuled
flight was cancelled be-
cause of engine problems.  So after waiting another hour - wearroved in S.D.
rather late.  My cold has been getting worse - but think thatI will survive.
 Give my best wished to all the staff at Casa Condesa.  Willkeep in touch -
as I don't want you all to forget me.  I have washed all my laundry- and
found another floating tag with a letter (L for large on it)???    El
gordito, with love,  Santiago.James,

You made our trip, and, we shallreturn.  Even made it to your artists
studios and met some wonderfulpeople.  I feel like I have good friends in
Acapulco now, and hope whenI return next year, to be able to thankyou in
person for making my vacationthe best one in years.  Michael Weil,  Fresno
and San Francisco Calif.
 

Thanks again James for a wonderfultime, you have a
great place and I felt rightat home.

Haven't seen the sun since Ileft Acapulco.  It hasn't
rained but its really foggyand and cold.  Around 42
degrees during the day and justbelow freezing at
night.

All the gifts made it back withthe exception of my 2
favorite plates and one mask.

When I get my film developedI'll send a pic.  Tell
Joe I said hello and give Pepemy best.

Merry Christmas

Tom

The Allure of Acapulco

I am just concluding my very firstvisit (although "visit" is much too lame a word) to Acapulco. As I write,I am relaxing in the sun and enjoying the beautiful view of Acapulco Bayfrom my perch atop the Casa Condesa. I am by no means a "travel snob",but I have vacationed somewhat extensively in the US, Canada & Europe,as well Puerto Rico, the Dominican Republic, and parts of the Eastern,Western & Southern Caribbean. Thus far, no place, NO PLACE matchesthe allure that is Acapulco. This magnificent resort has excited my senses,captivated my interests, captured my heart, Indeed, Acapulco has touchedmy soul.

In Acapulco, the weather is perfect,the bay is beautiful, the people warm and overwhelmingly hospitable. Acapulcohas a way of wrapping is arms around you and making you feel like thisis home. Acapulco is much more than a place; it is a way of life. It isperhaps the most relaxing place on earth and yet it also has energy, spirit,and a unique pace of life. It is not so much a place as it is an experienceinto which you enter and are quickly and effortlessly engulfed.

If you have never been here, dropwhat you are doing, pack and go!

Accommodations

While in Acapulco I have had theprivilege (yes, I said privilege, so what if I paid to stay here) of livingat the Casa Condesa. Jaime and Pepe (the proprietors) go out of their way,in fact, they seem to get real joy out of making their guests feel comfortable,relaxed and at home in their home. The sign on the wall as you enter thistropical, open-air paradise, speaks volumes: "Bienvenidos! Mi casa essu casa!"

The rooms are comfortable and nicelyappointed. Mine has a king size bed, a full bath and a beautiful view ofAcapulco Bay. The Casa Condesa has a swimming pool, a large open kitchen,a living room and dining area, lots of little tropical hiding places, anda roof top sundeck complete with a palapa and hammocks. There is handsomelandscaping throughout the property.

I have stayed in many guest houses,Bed & Breakfasts, and hotels but the Casa Condesa is unique and ina class all its own. Indeed, the "casa" HAS class. Here you ceasebeing a visitor, you cease being a guest, and you start being a part ofthe family.

Food:

While I have been assured that thereare many excellent eating establishments in Acapulco, I haven’t eaten inany. I chose instead to enjoy the cuisine and ambiance of the Casa Condesa.(Where else could you eat a wonderful dinner in boxer shorts and a t-shirt?)

I am a chef by hobby. I love toeat and enjoy food. The food here is excellent. It is a minor point tome that food is included in the price, if I wanted to go out to eat I would!Which brings me to another point -

My general "bitch" about B&Bsis the B which stands for breakfast. Normally that means bagels and danish,coffee and juice which gets tossed on a table somewhere around 7 a.m. andis promptly locked away at the stroke of 9. THAT is NOT the case at theCasa Condesa! Here you eat breakfast when you want it, IF you want it.Although Jaime has been insistent that I eat something before I trot mytired ass off to the beach. (And I thought I left my mother at home!)

Suffice it to say that when (noticeI said "when") I come back to Acapulco, I wouldn’t even consider stayinganywhere else!

Tips for the first time GringoVisitor to Acapulco:

1) The exchange rate is very favorable.It’s currently 10 pesos to 1 green back. A cocktail is $2. Beeris $1. You constantly have to divide by 10 to figure out what you justspent but what the hell. Do what I do, exchange $100 at a time and everytime that your pocket empties you know you’ve spent a hundred dollars!(I haven’t priced the boys but I’m relatively certain that they are asinexpensive as they are easy!)

2) NOTHING in Acapulco is logical.If you have a constant need to ask "why" you will be consummately frustrated.

3) Acapulcaños loveto party. They also suffer from terminal happiness. The are the nicest,happiest, friendliest people I’ve ever met. Sure, there are assholes everywhere,but they are very difficult to find in this city. (So, if you are lookingto spend time with assholes, go to Jamaica!)

4) Speaking of assholes ... if youenjoy sex, Acapulco should be right up your …. Alley. If you like beautiful,smooth, brown men with nice white smiles and big pingas, then whenyou come to Acapulco you will know that you have just passed through the"pearly gates". Don’t be bashful, Acapulco men love sex too. (Just smilenicely at one and he’s yours, at least for a few minutes!)

5) Language can be a challenge butnot a very big one. If you don’t speak Spanish (which I don’t) there isno real need to worry. Almost everybody speaks a little English. You willdo yourself a favor to learn a little Spanish - a few words or phrases.Acapulcañosfind it complimentary when you at least TRY. (It’s also good etiquettebut then again I’m not Miss Manners.) I mean hell, I could teach a monkeyhow to say, "Una (one) Margarita (that’s a drink not a girl),porfavor (please)." a) It is absolutely amazing what you can communicatewith a few Spanish words and lot of hand gestures. (Watch your gesturesthough or you might end up with a blow job instead of a drink!) b) Thelanguage of sex (let’s not confuse this with love) transcends ALL language.(If you are not able to get what you want and enjoy it here, then you probablyshouldn’t travel much!) c) Don’t be rude. This may come as a big surprisebut the whole world does not speak English and there are actually SOMEpeople who don’t want to learn it either! (You can be the richest man inthe world but that big wad of $100 bills is not going to make that cuteMexican boy start to spontaneously speak English.)

6) In my experience, Acapulco hasbeen very safe. I’ve crawled around at all hours of the day and night withoutencountering any problems. Keep in mind that this IS a big city. So keepyour eyes and ears open. (If you try not to be too much of a dumbass andif you manage not to get to smacked in the ass in the bars, you shouldbe fine.)

7) Don’t flash a big wad of money- pesos or dollars. (It might be good for your American ego butit will not impress the average Acapulcaño. It will howevermake them want it!)

8) There is something for everyonein Acapulco - dance clubs, dancing boys (who just happen to be naked),drag shows, etc. There are not a lot of gay bars (I counted 4) but unlessyou like to walk your ass off at 2 o’clock in the morning wandering frombar to bar, then you shouldn’t mind.

a) People here go out LATE, likeafter 12 a.m. (If your carriage usually turns into a pumpkin at midnight,take a NAP!)

b) The bars tend to close between4 and 5 a.m., as long as there are people there. Conversely, if there areNOT people, they close.

c) Don’t miss the bar scene. Letthe Acapulcaños give you a lesson in the art of partying.(In other words, unless you’re allergic to alcohol, loud music, dancing,or people, go out at least once while you’re here. Who knows you mighteven get lucky!)

9) Be careful of the Acapulco sun.It’s hot and intense and it will fry your lily white ass off, or, for thatmatter, any other part of your body. (Duh! Use sunscreen!)

a) Do not let the above keep youfrom going to the beach. It’s an absolute riot, not to mention beautiful,and I’m not just talking about the sand and the surf!

10) It seems like everything isfor sale, probably because it is. You will undoubtedly be offered someridiculous items, including perhaps the person selling them. YesterdayI asked myself as I was being offered a marble bull by a pleasant and beautifulyoung man: "What would I EVER do with THAT?" (Trust me. Even if you findyourself on the beach in a drunken stupor with money to burn, you willnever, ever need a marble bull.)

Rule #1: If it’s the boy you reallywant then don’t buy the marble bull, just buy the boy. You’ll have morefun with him anyway!

Rule #2: If you really are thatcrazy and think you can’t live without the marble bull, then never paythe first price they ask for it. Have fun, barter. (If he’s cute then barterharder and longer!)

11) Don’t bring a lot of shit withyou. You won’t need half of it. Acapulco is very relaxed and laid back.This is a difficult one for me because I like to take everything with me,just in case. This time I didn’t and I’m glad. (So, Gladys, leave the hatboxes and steamer trunks in the attic. Besides, they won’t even begin tofit in the back of Jaime’s jeep!)

When you finally arrive in Acapulco,kick back, ditch your watch and whatever clothes you’re comfortable doingwithout. Then take a deep breath and get ready for the enchantment of aparadise called ACAPULCO!

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